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Funny Things People Have Said At/About Theme Parks

There are so many great lines I've hear from the GP at amusement parks but the one that's coming to mind right now is once when I was queuing for a ride at Disneyland and this kid was crying and the mother got all angry and was like "Stop crying! This is 'the happiest place on Earth'!!!!!"
 
Madame_Furie describes Camelot as "The place parents go to hit their kids" - so true :)
 
When I was queuing for Spinball (I think?) at Alton Towers last week, there was an unusual video of The Incredible Hulk on the TV's, but was advertising Alton Towers.
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I saw that at Thorpe years ago, I think it was just advertising all the Merlin parks.
 
A group of chavy kids thought one of the Wraith statues in Th13teens station was meant to be Jesus.
 
My dad, being the childish man that he is, likes to loudly speak of accidents that have happened on the rides. He makes them all up of course, but it is still funny to see the look on people's faces when they believe Detonator's brakes once failed and the whole thing plummetted through the floor.
 
Kebab said:
When I was queuing for Spinball (I think?) at Alton Towers last week, there was an unusual video of The Incredible Hulk on the TV's, but was advertising Alton Towers.
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This is a MasterCard advert. It usually goes along the lines of:

'Thirteen Mug: £5, Nemesis T-Shirt: £7, Your dad screaming like your little sister on a rollercoaster: Priceless'
 
Two Londoners in front of me in the queue for Nemesis:

Girl: Mate, have you ever ridden Stealth? It's at Thorpe Park!
Lad: Yes course man! It was well sick! I went at the front!
Girl: I know right? I went at the front too. It's well scary at the front, cos at the front, there is no one in front of you!
Lad: I know! And you can see everything!

A guy on the bus to Alton Towers earlier this year:
"Do you know what I can't wait to ride today?! Black Hole! I haven't been in forever and that is my favourite ride!"

2 girls having a conversation on the coach from college to Alton Towers:
Girl 1: Is Nemesis scary?
Girl 2: A bit why?
Girl 1: I wanna ride it. But I hate rollercoasters. What does it do?
Girl 2: Well it goes up, then down, then upside down, then left and thats pretty much it. It's not a rollercoaster though because of it going upside down.
 
People leave their brains in their cars when they arrive at ANY theme park.

One that instantly springs to mind

Queueing for Rita.

Brain dead moron number 1: Are my shoes going to fall off?
Brain dead moron number 2: Yeah, it's like THE Nemesis where your feet hang.

Me: I don't know if anyone's told you this yet, but there's this thing that's just been invented called "The Floor", that should stop your shoes from falling off. Unless the floor falls off, that seems to happen on a regular basis.
 
You'd think people would actually look at the ride before getting into the queue.

Here's one I heard at school:

"Last year I went to Thorpe Park and I only went on the crazy teacup ride."

First of all, it's Storm in a Teacup, but I don't expect them to remember that.

Secondly, and more importantly, how the **** did you manage to ride only Storm in a Teacup?
 
^Ahh... but they didn't say how many times they'd been on the teacups... ;)
 
dj-fireball999 said:
Brain dead moron number 1: Are my shoes going to fall off?
Brain dead moron number 2: Yeah, it's like THE Nemesis where your feet hang.
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Because of course your shoes would fall off on Nemesis, haha. Think for a second, geez! I'm pretty sure shoes are designed to stay on your feet even when they are dangling in the air...
 
I know...I was making a comment about Nemesis, not Rita. Don't assume I'm a numskull. I read the initial post just as you did.
 
^ I have to agree with that.

Some I've heard at school are:

"My dad designed Colossus at Thorpe Park!"

"My uncle is building the new ride at Thorpe Park, and he says its going to go upside down 11 times!"

"My uncle works for the company who made Nemesis Inferno and SAW - The Ride!"

Another one that annoys me is:

"My bar came up when were going up! I had to hold on for my life all the way round!"

My brother's friend told him that Colossus broke down upside down when he was on it. *facepalm*
 
reddude said:
I know...I was making a comment about Nemesis, not Rita. Don't assume I'm a numskull. I read the initial post just as you did.
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I know that came along pretty snarky, but I was just kidding.
 
Me and an ex girlfriend were going on X:NWO behind us in the queue was a middle aged mum and her son, he was a hyper little fella that would not shut up. We board the train and they sit in a seat behind us we are the only ones on the ride as we were going up the lift hill all was very quiet just before we hit the top of the hill we heard his mum shout "BARNABY WILL YOU STOP PLAYING WITH YOUR WILLY!!!"

Well we both just lost it for the rest of the day, funniest thing I have ever heard echo around the pyramid...
Still I suppose thats one way of making X a bit more interesting..
 
Just watched a video that apparently aired on BBC about the growth of the theme park industry in Asia and I must say the Asians they interviewed knew their stuff. I was impressed and happy to finally see regular everyday park-goers making intelligent and logical comments.
 
I was on a 70 feet coaster, and at the top of the lifthill, one of the persons infront of me said ''Stop!! Stop!!'' and tried to grab onto the catwalk fence. She didn't reach it and when we went downhills she shouted ''Nyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!''.
 
DDF14 said:
BARNABY WILL YOU STOP PLAYING WITH YOUR WILLY!!!
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If my mum had called me Barnaby, I would have done everything possible to get back at her as well. Poor kid.
 
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