SUNDAY 16TH OCTOBER
Early alarms greeted us this morning which would make most people groan but to get 4 people in each hotel room showered, dressed and down to the breakfast buffet in time to make it to the park entrance, and in this case Klugheim, it was a total necessity. Luckily the simply beautiful Matamba hotel guaranteed a good comfy night’s sleep, the beds were incredibly cosy…but excitement nerves got the better of me as I still managed to wake up at 5am instead of 6. The reality of visiting my most anticipated park had finally sunk in! It’s Phantasia, can you blame me?
After the group ploughed through mountains of bacon, eggs and toast at the fab buffet (or plodded down to slowly much on toast minutes before leaving time for some…) it was time to make our way to the turnstiles. From the giddy attitudes and beaming faces it’s clear we were all hyped up about the day ahead! I love moments like this with CF. It wasn’t long before we were in the entrance plaza and wow! What a first impression! I’d heard stories from many enthusiasts about the theming here but I was still blown away by the level of detail everywhere, it’s impeccable. Gawking aside it was again time for Ian to unleash his swarm of goonlings as we all stampeded over to the new-for-2016 area, Klugheim – home of the ferocious Taron!
In case you couldn’t tell from the photos it’s actually the crazy looking rockwork dominating the skyline that catches your gaze before the winding mess of track. I remember a few folks weren’t very happy with the rock theming during construction but I for one really admire it, it’s almost otherworldly and really makes you feel like you’re in a mythological setting. It’s a good thing it’s all nice to look at it because it turned out the coaster wouldn’t be opening for another hour! A wave of groans swept through the group but luckily this meant more time to get photos of the track and truly soak in the Klugheim atmosphere while socialising to pass time. Just before the hour mark a strange ROAR erupted from the canyons – it was the sound of Taron’s launch, which meant we all got to fawn over the coaster in action, almost like an appetiser before getting to ride the beast! After a few trains the red rope was dropped and it was finally time to ride. The fantastic Taron theme, once again provided by IMAscore, really made our venture to the station feel that much more epic.
TARON
Once again my new cred excitement was kicking in once we made it to the airgates. The moment before finally riding something you’ve looked forward to and followed the construction of is always a magical moment. I was lucky enough to ride back row with Ian Bell himself and he even presented me with a genuine CF Goon Strap so I could now actually see in full HD with my glasses! Can’t think of a better way to ride a new cred
I won’t go into full detail about the layout because I could gush for hours about it…but also because it’s such a mess of intertwining track that it’s hard to pinpoint a solid layout! I will say that our initial ride was a little, shall we say, lacking. It was still good don’t get me wrong but it all just seemed a bit underwhelming, from the weak launches to it practically crawling over some hills and just generally meandering, it was just a bit bleh. About a
7-8/10.
But that was because it was first thing in the morning and hadn’t warmed up yet, and my gosh when this thing is fired up…it’s an insane relentless monster, a solid 10/10. But I’ll go into that later when I wrap up the Phantasia report the same way we ended the day: the high note of one of the most intense and ecstatic ERTs.
CHIAPAS
Another mystery ride for me in the long line of attractions I didn’t want to spoil for myself before visiting, all I knew is it was a log flume with that extra Phantasialand flair and that everyone I’d spoken to about it rated it very high. Expectations were high!
As is tradition with water rides and CF there were some arranged ‘fat boats’ and ‘virgin boats’ of which I fell into the latter category, repeated again later on a much more wild and wet water ride but that’s for later! At first (if you somehow managed to ignore the enormous steep drop en route to the ride entrance) Chiapas may seem like your standard log flume as it drifts around bends and scenery, albeit beautiful scenery (as to be expected at this park) but it has some surprises up its sleeve. Before I explain some of the layout I can’t even stress enough how outstanding the landscaping and interaction with the neighbouring Colorado Adventure is, being sandwiched between that coaster’s two lifthills creates a busy and immersive effect. Seeing further parts of Chiapas as you climb the first lifthill gives you that “Wait…is
THAT what’s ahead?!” feeling and really pumps up the anticipation. There’s a fairly big drop after touring the excavation cave that provides some decent airtime and depending where you sit will either get you wet or just a tad bit moist.
Coming out of the drop comes one of the rides many magical touches as the boat is met with a dead end before being ‘blown’ backwards by a gust of mist that bellows from a statue in the wall. Did Phantasia need to add that to a turntable? No, but they did and that’s what makes the park so lovable. You cruise backwards for a while and enter the Rave in the Cave (as I call it), a cavern with a funky dance remix of the main theme music, flashing lights and dancing totems. It’s crazy but I love it! You exit down a backwards drop with another lifthill to your right which makes you assume there’s a bit more drifting before you reach it…wrong! The boat comes to a halt and in a “WTF” moment you’re shifted from the left side to right, once again aided by the wind gods blowing at the boat. It caught me by surprise and the transition is so seemless, there’s no real wait for the transfer mechanism to align in place or slow shift, it’s all really speedy. They could’ve stuck with another boring turntable but they yet again went the extra mile! Following this you climb two more hills which along with the amazing views of the park builds the anticipation for what the ride has been building up to – the giant vertical drop! It picks up some good speed and you don’t realise quite how tall it is until you’re about to plummet, the little airtime hill as you come out of the dip is a welcome bonus and a great finale to an awesome ride.
10/10 from me!
COLORADO ADVENTURE
Formerly the ‘Michael Jackson Thrill Coaster’ this cred was our next destination – perfect for drying off after Chiapas. I initially dismissed it as a standard family friendly Mine Train but jeez was I wrong! I waited for back row as I usually try to on my first ride and it was recommended by those who’d already ridden it. Definitely worth it! It starts out fairly uneventful but then decides to go completely mental as it dives into a pitch black tunnel – this drop took me by surprise and being in the back means the pull into the tunnel is really snappy and picks up a lot of speed. This happens twice on the coaster and it’s brilliant, it’s totally unexpected as the majority of the track is out of sight before you queue. Take it from me if you sit near the back your butt won't be sat on that seat very often! I'd say it's a decent length and dishes out some unexpected but welcome thrills. A good
8/10.
BLACK MAMBA
I don’t really know what to say about this coaster having only ridden it once so I don’t feel I could form a proper opinion of it but I will say that it was another on my long to-do list I made in 2010. It’s safe to say that “hyped” doesn’t even begin to cut it, B&M inverts have always been a favourite of mine. It also became very apparent that Black Mamba isn’t a very easy coaster to photograph but maybe that’s a combination of how well it’s woven into the landscape and tunnels and the fact the queue was fast moving so photo opportunities were low. Speaking of the queue I thought it was great, being dotted with waterfalls and Sudanese style buildings the queue passes through and the absence of a cattlepen is always a bonus.
One of many paintings throughout the Mamba queue
The queue is so picturesque, there are lots of waterfalls surrounding it.
The station itself is really dark, borderline pitch-black in places and with the pounding drum soundtrack it’s a fantastic atmosphere. I think I was sat towards the middle-back of the train so the forces were pretty strange: aggressively quick, snappy transitions and darn intense in places – it should have been perfect. But it all kind of seemed like a blur, almost TOO much going on…maybe not being able to see the track in front of me caused some disorientation? All I know is I know I enjoyed it overall but having only ridden it the one time I don’t think I can rate it honestly so I’m going to say
9/10 for now. I’d like to re-ride a few times so I can get a true feel for it.
TALOCAN
The first flat ride of the day! As is normally the case with flats on Lives a lot of CF sat this one out…but that’s an experience in itself since Talocan is SUCH a spectator-friendly ride. It may look like your average Top Spin at first but not only is it double sided, it also runs a mental cycle complete with an incredible soundtrack, water fountains and fire! Lots of fire!! Dan (Attackhammer) and I prayed to Harambe wishing for the side facing the fire and onlookers but the gorilla wasn’t on our side as we were placed on the seats opposite the back wall, which wasn’t a bad thing since it felt like a constant near miss! Everyone who rode it came off absolutely filled with adrenaline, it’s just such an assault on all your senses and it doesn’t hold back in the slightest when it comes to flipping and throwing you about everywhere. I can’t give it anything other than a
10/10.
We broke for lunch at this point, a lot of us wanted to sashay back to Klugheim to eat at the Norse pub- themed restaurant so that’s where we went. Sadly it was too busy for the amount of time we had before regrouping which is a shame but eh, another excuse to return I guess
We settled for pretzels and baked pastry things, pretty decent value for money. As expected talk soon turned to Taron and the general consensus was that we knew it hadn’t shown its full might during our ride in the morning and we were all very, VERY eager to return to it for our hour ERT later on. We also got far too excited about the nearby toilets which were immensely themed but absolutely reeked of sewage – I sure hope the stench was just part of the theming too…
RAIK
I’m certain we rode this just before we ordered our food but I’m too lazy to rework the above structure to fit it in, this review’s taking long enough as it is! Anyway, tucked away underneath the almighty Taron is the other coaster, a Vekoma Junior Boomerang, which opened this year alongside the new area and it’s quite the hidden gem. The station has these green lights lining the walls that switch to a menacing red once the train is dispatched which I think is a nice little touch. The lifthill for the forwards section is in a deep trench beneath Taron and enclosed at the top which just goes to show the park put lots of thought into this coaster’s theming even if it is the “lesser” of the two rides in the area. At the back you get some nice forces and a surprising dose of speed although I wasn’t as impressed by the backwards run…maybe I’m just not a fan of coasters in reverse as a whole. In any case it’s inoffensive and a nice addition to Klugheim, I think it’s great for kids feeling brave and ready to move on to the bigger coasters. Better than Ben 10!
7/10
Maus Au Chocolat
This fun 3d shooter ride was our post-lunch rendezvous. Depending how competitive I feel I generally don’t bother with the guns on dark shooters as I much prefer to sit back and appreciate all the animatronics and scenery. Maus however is a trackless shooter almost entirely dependent on screens and 3D glasses so I had no choice but to get properly involved – not that I minded since I was intrigued! The theme is you’re in a chocolatier/baker’s factory that’s been overrun with mice intent on spiting the place, and that’s where the fab guns mounted on the cars come into play, so you can shoot as many as you can before moving on to the next scene. It may all be in German but the narrative is easy enough for anyone to follow.
I was initially a little skeptical about this as we boarded since I have awful eyesight and as a result can’t really get the full effect of 3D but luckily I didn’t need to worry as I could actually see it properly! The animations look really nice and when cakes and chocolate pellets are flying towards you and all over the place it’s chaotic! The ride lasts over 3 minutes, maybe around the 5 minute mark which in most cases would feel like an overstayed welcome but Maus au Chocolat is entertaining and engaging enough to keep riders invested, though I will say rolling the wheel over and over to shoot while aiming the gun does tire your wrist and arm out and I know I wasn’t the only one suffering! Still an awesome ride, hindered only by the arm-ache.
9/10
WINJAS
These unique coasters are tucked away in Wuze Town, be sure not to miss them!
Dark queue! You know it's been a long wait when you resort to photographing fake candles
The two spinners were next bringing with them the longest queue of the day which is to be expected with spinners. It wouldn’t be so bad if the queue didn’t STINK, it’s indoors so there’s no escape! It was humid too which added to the grossness. As with all CF queues we found ways to make it less tedious, Ian even got an informative lesson on furries since he had some burning questions – he decided he’d be a beagle if he was an animal. It was also in this queue that Richard discovered the shoulder straps on my Zelda bag can be unclipped so naturally he abused this whenever he could…
Fear was the first of the two Winjas. I knew these coasters had trick-track gimmicks but I couldn’t remember which ones belonged to each coaster so there was still that element of surprise! If you haven’t been and don’t want it spoiled then I suggest skipping this part but I think others have already explained it so you probably already know. Fear’s gimmick is that at one point the track moves and slants forward like a seesaw, tipping your car straight into a big drop into a layout that’s pretty much the same as the neighbouring
Force. Speaking of which, the trick up Force’s sleeve is a section of track that ‘falls’ to the left, banking heavily before plummeting into a drop. One feature both sides share is a random track bounce before heading back into the station, it’s so bizarre and caught me off guard! I rate them about the same although I think the Force element felt stranger and had some bonus airtime hills thrown in so it tips the scales just that little bit more for me. Fear:
6/10, Force:
8/10.
D...dragonnnnssss <3
My memory here’s a little foggy but I think we did the
Funhouse next which was…fun! The preshow was fun, simulating an elevator that breaks down prompting a hotel staff member to open the top hatch and tell you everything’s okay. It’s obviously a screen on the ceiling but it’s done well enough! The rest is the usual funhouse antics albeit with some fancy theming and plates. Lots of plates.
Temple of the Nighthawk and a
boat ride were next (after someone coated themselves in icing sugar, Sean I think?) but as if the lack of their own header and paragraph isn’t enough of a hint the less said about these boring rides the better. Nighthawk is especially awful and this outdated coaster is really a blemish on an otherwise stellar line up. Rip it out!
RIVER QUEST
Hmm, that's a very steep drop, SURELY that can't belong to a rapids ride...
Ah, the mysterious rapids that everyone was so excited for all the Phantasia n00bs to ride! I still laugh at how everyone was so determined to distract me and the other River Quest virgins from seeing even the slightest bit of what awaited, to the point Richard even pulled my hat over my face until we were in the “unique” lifthill. I’m going to refrain from giving away the surprises since I want everyone to blindly experience the craziness like I did, it’s just that insane. All I’ll say is it’s SOAKING WET and has so much WTF stuff that a UK park would never allow it! Also, Richard got engulfed by a tidal wave splash and briefly totally vanished which caused everyone on the boat to burst into hysterics. It’s a hilarious sight burned into my memory I’ll never forget!
10/10 for sheer craziness.
MYSTERY CASTLE
Aka Mysterious Sue’s humble abode! This is the tower that you can see from virtually anywhere in the park so the intimidation factor is really high by the time you eventually make your way over to it, made particularly worse for me not being the biggest tower ride fan. I kind of like shot towers but they still make me anxious! Now usually I’d want to keep what it is secret but it’s
kind of obvious what a tower that tall is hiding, even so the walkthrough section does a good job keeping the suspense flowing: it’s a series of winding dark corridors, lab equipment and staircases lit only by a faint blue glow. I can’t remember if there was a soundtrack or just ambience but either way the mood is incredible.
The actual ride itself is a strange one, I’ve heard it runs different sequences depending what time of the day it is. We must’ve hit the just-get-it-over-and-done-with cycle period because the actors in the ride station very hastily rushed us into our seats and launched us up without giving any sort of boarding speech like they’re apparently meant to do, which in a way was quite nerve wracking. I didn’t think the launches or drops were that intense but that was probably because I was too busy looking around and wondering why the hell the floor was following us up the tower. Our sequence consisted of the initial launch to the top where all the electricity on the ceiling goes berserk, followed by the big drop to about halfway down, then another launch and finally a drop all the way down to the bottom. So not terrible but I know it’s capable of better! For this cycle I think I’d give it an
8/10.
We had enough time after Mystery Castle to fit in one more ride of our choosing before our scheduled ERT in Klugheim so we all split up, Chris wanted to re-ride Colorado Express so I was more than happy to join him. We sat at the back again and holy crap it was even more out of control than earlier, it absolutely barrelled down the drops into the tunnels so much so that we were basically standing up. It was night at this point so it was pitch black making it hard to see what was coming and generally made a great ride experience. We all came off glad we chose it as our last ride! Well, last ride before the TRUE final ride session. That awaited back in Klugheim…
TARON: ROUND 2
Photos taken earlier in the day, I was too busy riding to get any night shots of it!
A mix of excitement and the slight issue of not really knowing our way back to the meeting point resulted in a bit of a frantic running session that no doubt looked a bit silly to any onlookers but…CREDS! Luckily we were on time and basically arrived at the same time as the rest of CF although just like in the morning Klugheim was closed off for a while. Déjà vu anyone? Conversation was rife about how different Taron would ride now that it’s had a full day to warm up and the general atmosphere was electric, it felt great to be a part of.
Once those giant wooden doors creaked open that was it, the area officially belonged to CoasterForce…well there were some hotel guests too but so few that it was still
practically ours. I must say that while seeing it in all its glory during daylight is incredible there’s something even more menacing about the black track twisting in the darkness and wrapping around the wonderfully lit Klugheim buildings. As is the norm with ERT it was basically a free-for-all and a huge amount of re-rides were had so I can’t really document it in its entirety but I will go on to explain just how much better it was than our lacklustre morning ride.
Before I start I’ll say that I did have my lapbar stupidly loose, maybe about 1 click thanks to the trusted “belly out” trick when staff check the restraints and while it was exhilarating I genuinely DO NOT recommend doing this if you’re as slim as I am as it really did feel like I was about to be ejected at some points. I’m sure it’s safe but just throwing it out there. What was originally a mediocre first launch was transformed into a forceful punch straight into the onslaught of S-bends, airtime hills and heavily banked sharp curves, with each element full of force and determined to throw you from your seat. The swooping dive into the 2nd launch is where the intensity is cranked up to 11 – the coaster reaches around 70mph at this part and damn it certainly feels like it, it’s that same gut-wrenching sensation you get on Stealth! It launches up out of the ditch straight into a mean airtime hill and to be honest it’s so quick and intense that it’s hard to recall the exact layout. All I know is it’s relentless to the point many of us had tears in our eyes from the sheer speed. I’d say back towards the back definitely gives the better ride with its barbaric forces but riding at the front provides that unrivalled wind-in-your-face speed and lets you see everything as it approaches. Either way it’s absolutely breath taking at night and if you get the chance I highly advise it. Words can’t even begin to describe it.
An hour later and we were all understandably exhausted, our bodies were probably put into shock from putting them through such intense forces, but boy was it worth it! Many of us were now declaring it a new #1 (sorry, Katun still holds that crown ;p) and it just goes to show how much of a difference the time of day when it comes to riding coasters. After all those insane re-rides I can now confidently give it a stellar
10/10. Hell,
11/10!
Absolutely drained but satisfied after such a long day we said our goodbyes and headed out of Germany and back to the Netherlands. I was in Del Piero’s fab car again with Ben, Maddie and…JayJay? Or was it Jake? (Apologies my memory is terrible…) and we made a crucial stop at BEDBURGER LAND!!!! Look at the size of the beer you can get here too, the Dutch really don’t f**k about!
After all that excitement we arrived at our trashy motel style hotel for the night, the last sleep of the official Live ahead of the final park, Efteling! Next part to come soon, work is super busy but I’ll try not to take a million years this time! Thanks for reading <3
