When I first toyed with the idea of a “Life Outside” forum,
For those of you that don’t know me that well or read what I post, very year for the last five years, me and my local mates go to the Isle of Wight and get pissed.
It’s now a tradition. It’s all about boys and their beer. There’s no talk about families, problems, babies or any other such bollox. It’s about getting pissed on an island with good friends
I’m aware that some of you don’t like alcohol and look down your noses on people who do use it as an excuse for having a good time, so I dedicate this topic to you.
As always, the day starts at Southampton’s Red Funnel ferry terminal.
The ferry journey between Southampton and East Cowes takes about an hour. It’s a gash way to start a day, but it has to be done. We all kill time in our own little way.
I did the sodukos in the Sun.
I also counted how many nipples there were in the Daily Sport. Can’t remember the exact figure, but it was nearly 300!
Seeing as everybody loves Paul, here he is doing what he loves best….
….play fruit machines!
Mark read a book. He’s the most intellectual out of all of us. Apparently the book was about cause and effect. I nodded politely as he explained.
Others eat, walked around on deck, read papers. Just after midday, we had docked in East Cowes!
We cover about 100 miles driving around the Island so obviously somebody has to stay sober. This year it was the turn of Mess to drive. He was quite happy about it tbh. For the last few years he had fallen asleep by 5pm.
Eager for a lovely refreshing pint of warm English ale, our first pub was only a couple of miles drive away. The trouble with the Isle of Wight is that the roads are very slow and it’s full of old people. It took 20mins to travel 3 miles.
The first Stop was The Sloop in Wotton Bridge. An ok pub, a cheap carvary but we weren’t interested in food just yet! After our traditional toast to the Isle of Wight, the banter and drinking competition begins!
Either there’s something up with Marriot’s pint or he’s not impressed with the jokes.
To guide us around the Isle of Wight, we use The CAMRA Good Beer Guide. We refer to it as “The Good Book” because it’s our bible. Although this bible is actual based on fact.
We take The Good Book in every pub. It occasionally makes us look like beer geeks, but we want a good pint so we’re never ashamed! As we’re supping our pint, we’ll plan the route to the next pub.
We went to the Solent Inn in Ryde.
It’s one of the best pubs on the Island if you ask me. Loads of decent beer, good honest pub food at reasonable prices and it’s not a plastic chain pub. An honest backstreet free house. The landlady (on the right) remembers us every year and always gives us a bowl of nuts.
Apart from Marriot and Mark, we’re all smokers (although they do occasionally when wasted), so we’re forced to sit outside most of the time. That’s fine if the weather is good. The Solent has a lovely beer garden.
We ate in the Solent as well. I had a ploughman’s, Mess and Marriot had steak, Ren and Paul had fajitas, and Mark had a steak & cheese baguette.
Who is reaching for the cider?
It’s the big man!
Next pub was The Vine Inn in St Helens.
It was Mark’s round. He was cheesed off because the service was SLOW.
Mess and I had a game of pool.
I lost.
It was winner stays on, so Mark played Mess.
Meanwhile, Paul and Marriot played the fruit machines. Ren managed to capture the money they won the jackpot!
Before we knew it, it was time to get back in the car. We had a Nissan Gashqai!
The car journeys between pubs tend to be long enough to enjoy a few songs and let the beer go down.
Bembridge was next, the pub was called The Olde Village Inn. It’s an ok pub, nothing remarkable. A couple of locals at the bar seemed interested in what we were doing and I managed to answer their question… The answer was Monosodium glutamate :wink:
It was only 3:15pm, I think the booze was starting to tire Mark out.
However, the rest of us were really getting into the swing of things!
We trapped a wasp in the glasses. There were loads of the buggers in this pub!
The locals recommended The Old Comical pub to us. Apparently it featured in an episode of Location, Location, Location.
In Groundhog Day fashion, we played some pool…
…and Paul, yes, you know…
We didn’t stay for long. Our next hit was The Four Seasons in Wroxhal.
Last year, Mess threw up all over the beer garden! Thankfully the landlord didn’t remember us but Mess was still a bit sheepish,.
The tempo was beating fast now, so I consulted The Good Book for the next drinking establishment.
It was to be The White Horse in Whitwell. We decided to do drink our beer through straws this time round. Spice things up a bit.
We really gayed up Mess’ lime and soda.
Booze can either make you really happy or depressed. It’s easy to work out how it’s affecting Mark right now.
Anyway, we cracked jokes, took the piss out of one another and discussed stuff as if we were so righteous. We also double-up in this pub.
Hurrah! Something changed Mark’s mood!
On we headed to The White Lion in Arreton.
If you’re wondering who was taking these photos, it was Ren. He doesn’t like anybody playing with his camera, but I managed to nick it to take a quick snap of him.
It was time for more food. We tried one pub on the way but the menu looked ****. We had a pint there though. We soon moved on to the next pub, the Sun in Calbourne.
There was an hour-long wait for food. A bit annoying but it gave us time to drink, smoke and be merry.
We were getting quite rowdy now. We were constantly taking the piss out of each other, laughing, singing and generally being twats. Mess couldn’t believe what he’s usually missed out on!
But we were hungry. We worked our way clockwise around the Island and the pubs are far and few between in the west. We had no choice to wait. Paul was getting a bit cheesed off.
So to lighten the mood, we had another pint!
Eventually we sat down inside and ate our food. I opted for bacon dumplings. They were delicious, but to be honest, after the long wait and all the beer, a skinned rat in Raybould special sauce would have been appetising.
After eating, we purposely crammed back in the Gashqai and headed to Freshwater. We went to the Prince of Wales pub. It’s a local pub for local people. The sort of pub where everybody goes silent when you enter and looks at you. It doesn’t feel friendly at all.
The landlord is also the longest serving publican on the Isle of Wight but he’s also the most miserable. He never makes us feel welcome, but with some polite "thank yous" and addressing him as “sir”, he’s an alright bloke.
We made this one a quick one. We felt it would have been inappropriate to raise our voices or enjoy ourselves there. We did put 50p in the pool table though.
What does Paul think of the Prince of Wales pub?
Time was against us now, so our final pub of the day was the Fat Cat in Freshwater Bay. It’s a chavvy pub, but at least it has life. I wasn’t in the mood for a chav atmosphere.
That didn’t stop Marriot from being a bit sideways though.
The Isle of Wight Piss-Up 2010 had come to an end. We sang and farted our way back to East Cowes and caught the ferry back to Southampton.
These steps are a nightmare when you’ve had a skin full!
Mark read his book…
…Marriot kept up the cheese factor….
…and I fell asleep.
In all, we each drank (with the exception of the diver!), 13 pints each. Although Mark was on JD and coke from the second pub onwards, so he probably consumed less units overall.
Although it was an amazing day out, I certainly paid for it over the weekend. I was quite useless. I had no desire to do anything apart from sleep, had really bad guts and a headache that lasted for four days.
I can’t wait to do it again next year Cheers for reading!
It's like furie can see the future!furie said:it's also a place for you to put your Isle of Wight reports Ian
For those of you that don’t know me that well or read what I post, very year for the last five years, me and my local mates go to the Isle of Wight and get pissed.
It’s now a tradition. It’s all about boys and their beer. There’s no talk about families, problems, babies or any other such bollox. It’s about getting pissed on an island with good friends
I’m aware that some of you don’t like alcohol and look down your noses on people who do use it as an excuse for having a good time, so I dedicate this topic to you.
As always, the day starts at Southampton’s Red Funnel ferry terminal.
The ferry journey between Southampton and East Cowes takes about an hour. It’s a gash way to start a day, but it has to be done. We all kill time in our own little way.
I did the sodukos in the Sun.
I also counted how many nipples there were in the Daily Sport. Can’t remember the exact figure, but it was nearly 300!
Seeing as everybody loves Paul, here he is doing what he loves best….
….play fruit machines!
Mark read a book. He’s the most intellectual out of all of us. Apparently the book was about cause and effect. I nodded politely as he explained.
Others eat, walked around on deck, read papers. Just after midday, we had docked in East Cowes!
We cover about 100 miles driving around the Island so obviously somebody has to stay sober. This year it was the turn of Mess to drive. He was quite happy about it tbh. For the last few years he had fallen asleep by 5pm.
Eager for a lovely refreshing pint of warm English ale, our first pub was only a couple of miles drive away. The trouble with the Isle of Wight is that the roads are very slow and it’s full of old people. It took 20mins to travel 3 miles.
The first Stop was The Sloop in Wotton Bridge. An ok pub, a cheap carvary but we weren’t interested in food just yet! After our traditional toast to the Isle of Wight, the banter and drinking competition begins!
Either there’s something up with Marriot’s pint or he’s not impressed with the jokes.
To guide us around the Isle of Wight, we use The CAMRA Good Beer Guide. We refer to it as “The Good Book” because it’s our bible. Although this bible is actual based on fact.
We take The Good Book in every pub. It occasionally makes us look like beer geeks, but we want a good pint so we’re never ashamed! As we’re supping our pint, we’ll plan the route to the next pub.
We went to the Solent Inn in Ryde.
It’s one of the best pubs on the Island if you ask me. Loads of decent beer, good honest pub food at reasonable prices and it’s not a plastic chain pub. An honest backstreet free house. The landlady (on the right) remembers us every year and always gives us a bowl of nuts.
Apart from Marriot and Mark, we’re all smokers (although they do occasionally when wasted), so we’re forced to sit outside most of the time. That’s fine if the weather is good. The Solent has a lovely beer garden.
We ate in the Solent as well. I had a ploughman’s, Mess and Marriot had steak, Ren and Paul had fajitas, and Mark had a steak & cheese baguette.
Who is reaching for the cider?
It’s the big man!
Next pub was The Vine Inn in St Helens.
It was Mark’s round. He was cheesed off because the service was SLOW.
Mess and I had a game of pool.
I lost.
It was winner stays on, so Mark played Mess.
Meanwhile, Paul and Marriot played the fruit machines. Ren managed to capture the money they won the jackpot!
Before we knew it, it was time to get back in the car. We had a Nissan Gashqai!
The car journeys between pubs tend to be long enough to enjoy a few songs and let the beer go down.
Bembridge was next, the pub was called The Olde Village Inn. It’s an ok pub, nothing remarkable. A couple of locals at the bar seemed interested in what we were doing and I managed to answer their question… The answer was Monosodium glutamate :wink:
It was only 3:15pm, I think the booze was starting to tire Mark out.
However, the rest of us were really getting into the swing of things!
We trapped a wasp in the glasses. There were loads of the buggers in this pub!
The locals recommended The Old Comical pub to us. Apparently it featured in an episode of Location, Location, Location.
In Groundhog Day fashion, we played some pool…
…and Paul, yes, you know…
We didn’t stay for long. Our next hit was The Four Seasons in Wroxhal.
Last year, Mess threw up all over the beer garden! Thankfully the landlord didn’t remember us but Mess was still a bit sheepish,.
The tempo was beating fast now, so I consulted The Good Book for the next drinking establishment.
It was to be The White Horse in Whitwell. We decided to do drink our beer through straws this time round. Spice things up a bit.
We really gayed up Mess’ lime and soda.
Booze can either make you really happy or depressed. It’s easy to work out how it’s affecting Mark right now.
Anyway, we cracked jokes, took the piss out of one another and discussed stuff as if we were so righteous. We also double-up in this pub.
Hurrah! Something changed Mark’s mood!
On we headed to The White Lion in Arreton.
If you’re wondering who was taking these photos, it was Ren. He doesn’t like anybody playing with his camera, but I managed to nick it to take a quick snap of him.
It was time for more food. We tried one pub on the way but the menu looked ****. We had a pint there though. We soon moved on to the next pub, the Sun in Calbourne.
There was an hour-long wait for food. A bit annoying but it gave us time to drink, smoke and be merry.
We were getting quite rowdy now. We were constantly taking the piss out of each other, laughing, singing and generally being twats. Mess couldn’t believe what he’s usually missed out on!
But we were hungry. We worked our way clockwise around the Island and the pubs are far and few between in the west. We had no choice to wait. Paul was getting a bit cheesed off.
So to lighten the mood, we had another pint!
Eventually we sat down inside and ate our food. I opted for bacon dumplings. They were delicious, but to be honest, after the long wait and all the beer, a skinned rat in Raybould special sauce would have been appetising.
After eating, we purposely crammed back in the Gashqai and headed to Freshwater. We went to the Prince of Wales pub. It’s a local pub for local people. The sort of pub where everybody goes silent when you enter and looks at you. It doesn’t feel friendly at all.
The landlord is also the longest serving publican on the Isle of Wight but he’s also the most miserable. He never makes us feel welcome, but with some polite "thank yous" and addressing him as “sir”, he’s an alright bloke.
We made this one a quick one. We felt it would have been inappropriate to raise our voices or enjoy ourselves there. We did put 50p in the pool table though.
What does Paul think of the Prince of Wales pub?
Time was against us now, so our final pub of the day was the Fat Cat in Freshwater Bay. It’s a chavvy pub, but at least it has life. I wasn’t in the mood for a chav atmosphere.
That didn’t stop Marriot from being a bit sideways though.
The Isle of Wight Piss-Up 2010 had come to an end. We sang and farted our way back to East Cowes and caught the ferry back to Southampton.
These steps are a nightmare when you’ve had a skin full!
Mark read his book…
…Marriot kept up the cheese factor….
…and I fell asleep.
In all, we each drank (with the exception of the diver!), 13 pints each. Although Mark was on JD and coke from the second pub onwards, so he probably consumed less units overall.
Although it was an amazing day out, I certainly paid for it over the weekend. I was quite useless. I had no desire to do anything apart from sleep, had really bad guts and a headache that lasted for four days.
I can’t wait to do it again next year Cheers for reading!