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Rank the Alton Towers coasters

  1. Wicker Man The ride itself would rank much lower, but the experience is really great. I love the smell in the station and the fire effects (if they are working). The ride itself starts of good, but it shows its target audience very soon. Still a great experience, and my favorite ride at the park
  2. TH13Teen another family coaster on a high spot - I still enjoy this ride, even though it is not an intense one. The drop track is amazing, the layout is fun and I really like the speed the drive tires give you - you might even consider this a launch coaster.
  3. Galactica - I was actually suprised, how good this ride felt. Allthough it is a little bit slow (which appears to be a common theme in the park). I really like the part on your back. Overall a good ride.
  4. The Smiler I really want to like this one more, but I can't put it any higher. The theme is cool and different, I love the soundtrack and it's just great to look at. It's roughness is ok, and even it's inversions don't feel half as forced as Collosus' Quad Heartline roll. However, as I am quite tall, the OTSRs are just the dealbreaker. They are good OSTRs, but still hurt and are way too restrictive. Smiler + Infinity 2 Trains would be great, but I don't see it coming in the future. a) this would cost money and b) would generate happy customers, which is a thing that Merlin tries to avoid. Imagine people getting back to your park!
  5. Oblivion -The definition of a one trick pony. But the drop really feels good and is quite fun
  6. Rita Yes it's short and has not the best layout. But it's intense. But the OSTRs are also a major dealbreaker for me.
  7. Nemesis Here it is, the mighty and all hyped up Nemesis. As you can guess by it's position, I was extremely disappointed. It started of interesting and fun, went into the great helix after the first corkscrew, pulled great forces upon enterin the zero g and then slows down not one, but two gears. The rest of the layout feels about as intense as Th13teen, but with OTSRs. I really can't understand the hype. I much prefer Nemesis Inferno, which keeps it's decent intensity over the whole layout, making it the (in my opinion) far better and consistent ride.
  8. Spinball Whizzer One of the better spinning coasters. I enjoyed it, but due to its capacity, I only rode it once during my 2 day visit.
  9. Octonauts Rollercoaster Adventure It's supposed to be a Kiddie-Coaster, and it's a quite good one.
  10. Runaway Mine Train Not terrible, but one of those rides which was so forgettable, that I just can't remember anything more than riding it.

I have to admit that the whole park was really disappointing to me. No attraction really stood out as the signature ride, most of the attractions were decent, a few good, but nothing really outstanding. I will be back there at some day to give it a second chance (maybe when they open SC9 somewhere in the future), but I don't miss it at this point in time. Most coasters are quite close together, with a bigger gap between 3 and 4. If I had to describe Alton Towers lineup, I'd call it "not great, not terrible".
 
Trax said:
  1. Wicker Man The ride itself would rank much lower, but the experience is really great. I love the smell in the station and the fire effects (if they are working). The ride itself starts of good, but it shows its target audience very soon. Still a great experience, and my favorite ride at the park
  2. TH13Teen another family coaster on a high spot - I still enjoy this ride, even though it is not an intense one. The drop track is amazing, the layout is fun and I really like the speed the drive tires give you - you might even consider this a launch coaster.
  3. Galactica - I was actually suprised, how good this ride felt. Allthough it is a little bit slow (which appears to be a common theme in the park). I really like the part on your back. Overall a good ride.
  4. The Smiler I really want to like this one more, but I can't put it any higher. The theme is cool and different, I love the soundtrack and it's just great to look at. It's roughness is ok, and even it's inversions don't feel half as forced as Collosus' Quad Heartline roll. However, as I am quite tall, the OTSRs are just the dealbreaker. They are good OSTRs, but still hurt and are way too restrictive. Smiler + Infinity 2 Trains would be great, but I don't see it coming in the future. a) this would cost money and b) would generate happy customers, which is a thing that Merlin tries to avoid. Imagine people getting back to your park!
  5. Oblivion -The definition of a one trick pony. But the drop really feels good and is quite fun
  6. Rita Yes it's short and has not the best layout. But it's intense. But the OSTRs are also a major dealbreaker for me.
  7. Nemesis Here it is, the mighty and all hyped up Nemesis. As you can guess by it's position, I was extremely disappointed. It started of interesting and fun, went into the great helix after the first corkscrew, pulled great forces upon enterin the zero g and then slows down not one, but two gears. The rest of the layout feels about as intense as Th13teen, but with OTSRs. I really can't understand the hype. I much prefer Nemesis Inferno, which keeps it's decent intensity over the whole layout, making it the (in my opinion) far better and consistent ride.
  8. Spinball Whizzer One of the better spinning coasters. I enjoyed it, but due to its capacity, I only rode it once during my 2 day visit.
  9. Octonauts Rollercoaster Adventure It's supposed to be a Kiddie-Coaster, and it's a quite good one.
  10. Runaway Mine Train Not terrible, but one of those rides which was so forgettable, that I just can't remember anything more than riding it.

I have to admit that the whole park was really disappointing to me. No attraction really stood out as the signature ride, most of the attractions were decent, a few good, but nothing really outstanding. I will be back there at some day to give it a second chance (maybe when they open SC9 somewhere in the future), but I don't miss it at this point in time. Most coasters are quite close together, with a bigger gap between 3 and 4. If I had to describe Alton Towers lineup, I'd call it "not great, not terrible".
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I am desperate to ride the smiler, I actually like coasters that are a bit rough but looking at some reviews it is hit and miss how it rides.
 
Sorry to bump the thread, but mine has changed quite a bit since I last did it, so may as well post my new ranking:
  1. Wicker Man - I loved Wicker Man in 2018, and it was one of my biggest positive surprises ever when I first got off it on its opening weekend. But little did I know that I was in for yet another big shock when I rerode in July 2020, because the whole ride felt like it had been turned up a notch since 2018! The pacing, while fantastic in 2018, was absolutely impeccable in 2020; the whole ride definitely felt fast throughout, and sections of it were absolutely frantic! A ride that didn’t have an awful lot of airtime in 2018 had quite a few nice pops in 2020, some of which were pretty strong! Remarkably, the ride also managed to do this while also staying relatively smooth (by wooden coaster standards) and comfortable, and a combination of its rerideability and its pacing and airtime meant that even though I only had 2 rides, I would quite happily have sat on it all day! On the whole, Wicker Man is just the coaster that keeps on giving for me; my favourite at Alton Towers by a considerable distance, and hot on Icon’s heels for the title of my favourite UK coaster! 10/10, #3 overall
  2. Galactica - Galactica may not be the most intense coaster in the world, but it wasn’t designed to be; I personally love the experience it offers! It’s such a fun, smooth ride, while also keeping pretty consistent pace through the layout, and the feeling of flying is quite unlike anything else! On the whole, while Galactica isn’t the most intense, crazy, fast-paced coaster in the world, it is smooth, fun, and genuinely just a really nice ride that seems to grow on me every time I ride it! 8/10, #14 overall
  3. Oblivion - I was not that fussed on Oblivion the first time I rode it back in 2013, but like Galactica above, it grows on me every time I ride it! Between it and SheiKra at Busch Gardens Tampa, which I absolutely adore, I’ve grown to really like B&M Dive Coasters as a model, and while Oblivion may not be a huge behemoth with a wide variety of elements like SheiKra is, it does what it says on the tin for me; the drop is fantastic, and gives you such a rush! Overall, while Oblivion may have a very short ride duration, it proves that it’s not length that really matters, but what you do with that length! 8/10, #16 overall
  4. Nemesis - I do enjoy Nemesis, but I don’t rate it anywhere near as highly as most do anymore. However, instead of dwelling on my main gripes with it, which I’ll come to later, I’ll start with the positives. It’s got a very unique layout, and it’s an absolute feat of engineering in terms of how Wardley & B&M crammed it into that pit; it almost feels like it shouldn’t exist! Bits of it also pack a real punch; the helix is very intense (almost toeing the line of enjoyable intensity for me), but one thing I do like is that the coaster doesn’t expose you to high positive g’s for too long at once, so while it has very intense sections, they’re short enough that they don’t blow your head off and make you feel really ill, which I like. However, I do definitely have gripes with Nemesis. My first one is that it isn’t the smoothest of coasters compared to some other B&Ms I’ve been on, even ones of a similar sort of age; while I wouldn’t go as far as to call Nemesis rough, it’s definitely not particularly smooth, as there are a few places in the layout that induce somewhat painful headbanging; the zero-g roll and the corkscrews are a little bit jolty, in my opinion, and it does detract from my enjoyment of the ride when I come off with sore ears. It’s definitely a fierce coaster, in my opinion, and one of the rougher B&Ms I’ve ridden. My other gripe with Nemesis is that I do not think it is the strongest paced of coasters; there are 1 or 2 notable dead spots in the layout, with the most notable being the turnaround after the vertical loop, which I’ve seen it nearly stall trying to go into on some of my rides. I personally prefer coasters that offer a nice level of g-force and speed consistently throughout, such as Inferno, for example, so while Nemesis’ helix is probably more intense than any individual section of Inferno, for example, I think Inferno maintains a comfortable level of speed and g-force throughout, so I do personally prefer it for that reason. Still, Nemesis is a definite Alton Towers icon, and one of the most unique and admirable coasters in the UK! 7/10, #21 overall
  5. Thirteen - Thirteen may not be “the ultimate rollercoaster” that it was marketed as back in 2010, but it is a fun family roller coaster, in my opinion! There are actually some nice pops of airtime, in my opinion, and it’s blissfully smooth; Intamin & Alton Towers have done a wonderful job on making sure that Thirteen aged well! The ride’s key trick is also very well executed, in my opinion, and the backwards section packs a surprising punch! Overall, if you go down to the woods today, you’ll be sure to get an enjoyable ride out of Thirteen! 6/10, #22 overall
  6. Runaway Mine Train - Runaway Mine Train will always be a special coaster to me, being one of my first ever roller coasters! But even excluding my attachment to it, it is still a pretty great family ride, in my opinion! It has a nice pace to it for a family ride, with sections of it being surprisingly intense; the second helix has no business being on a family coaster! Overall, Runaway Mine Train, while nothing earth-shattering to us enthusiasts, has a really wide appeal, with everyone who rides it seeming to come off with a smile on their face, and surely that’s the most important thing of all? Choo Choo! 6/10, #26 overall
  7. Spinball Whizzer - Spinball Whizzer is a solid family coaster, in my opinion, but I find it a bit too jerky to rank it really highly. The layout is very good, however, and intensity-wise, I think it’s a good stepping-stone coaster! 4/10, #43 overall
  8. Octonauts Rollercoaster Adventure - Octonauts is a good coaster for the younger kids, but I can’t really say an awful lot more than that. It’s quite smooth, and the theming is very nice, I suppose, with a good water effect! 4/10, #49 overall
  9. The Smiler - Smiler is a novel idea, and I think the layout is a brilliant one given the space on offer and the intention of the designers, but I personally find it too rough to really enjoy these days. Most of the elements nowadays have some sort of jolt in them that makes me bang my head against the back of the seat every time, and there’s a very noticeable and persistent vibration. It often makes my head hurt when I get off it, and in all honesty, I’m not really sure if it’s my kind of coaster these days. It’s a wonderful coaster to watch, however! 3/10, #56 overall
  10. Rita - Rita has a great launch, but I seem to remember the rest of the layout being very rough. I admittedly haven’t ridden since April 2016, however; I definitely need a new perspective on it. I think I might go back on it next time I visit Towers. 3/10, #58 overall
I should probably point out that the score out of 10 is on my overall spectrum of enjoyment, and some of the rides would score far more highly on an individual basis (i.e. against similar rides). I should also point out that I have been on a total of 72 different roller coasters, so the overall ranking is out of 72.
 
Matt N said:
Sorry to bump the thread, but mine has changed quite a bit since I last did it, so may as well post my new ranking:
  1. Wicker Man - I loved Wicker Man in 2018, and it was one of my biggest positive surprises ever when I first got off it on its opening weekend. But little did I know that I was in for yet another big shock when I rerode in July 2020, because the whole ride felt like it had been turned up a notch since 2018! The pacing, while fantastic in 2018, was absolutely impeccable in 2020; the whole ride definitely felt fast throughout, and sections of it were absolutely frantic! A ride that didn’t have an awful lot of airtime in 2018 had quite a few nice pops in 2020, some of which were pretty strong! Remarkably, the ride also managed to do this while also staying relatively smooth (by wooden coaster standards) and comfortable, and a combination of its rerideability and its pacing and airtime meant that even though I only had 2 rides, I would quite happily have sat on it all day! On the whole, Wicker Man is just the coaster that keeps on giving for me; my favourite at Alton Towers by a considerable distance, and hot on Icon’s heels for the title of my favourite UK coaster! 10/10, #3 overall
  2. Galactica - Galactica may not be the most intense coaster in the world, but it wasn’t designed to be; I personally love the experience it offers! It’s such a fun, smooth ride, while also keeping pretty consistent pace through the layout, and the feeling of flying is quite unlike anything else! On the whole, while Galactica isn’t the most intense, crazy, fast-paced coaster in the world, it is smooth, fun, and genuinely just a really nice ride that seems to grow on me every time I ride it! 8/10, #14 overall
  3. Oblivion - I was not that fussed on Oblivion the first time I rode it back in 2013, but like Galactica above, it grows on me every time I ride it! Between it and SheiKra at Busch Gardens Tampa, which I absolutely adore, I’ve grown to really like B&M Dive Coasters as a model, and while Oblivion may not be a huge behemoth with a wide variety of elements like SheiKra is, it does what it says on the tin for me; the drop is fantastic, and gives you such a rush! Overall, while Oblivion may have a very short ride duration, it proves that it’s not length that really matters, but what you do with that length! 8/10, #16 overall
  4. Nemesis - I do enjoy Nemesis, but I don’t rate it anywhere near as highly as most do anymore. However, instead of dwelling on my main gripes with it, which I’ll come to later, I’ll start with the positives. It’s got a very unique layout, and it’s an absolute feat of engineering in terms of how Wardley & B&M crammed it into that pit; it almost feels like it shouldn’t exist! Bits of it also pack a real punch; the helix is very intense (almost toeing the line of enjoyable intensity for me), but one thing I do like is that the coaster doesn’t expose you to high positive g’s for too long at once, so while it has very intense sections, they’re short enough that they don’t blow your head off and make you feel really ill, which I like. However, I do definitely have gripes with Nemesis. My first one is that it isn’t the smoothest of coasters compared to some other B&Ms I’ve been on, even ones of a similar sort of age; while I wouldn’t go as far as to call Nemesis rough, it’s definitely not particularly smooth, as there are a few places in the layout that induce somewhat painful headbanging; the zero-g roll and the corkscrews are a little bit jolty, in my opinion, and it does detract from my enjoyment of the ride when I come off with sore ears. It’s definitely a fierce coaster, in my opinion, and one of the rougher B&Ms I’ve ridden. My other gripe with Nemesis is that I do not think it is the strongest paced of coasters; there are 1 or 2 notable dead spots in the layout, with the most notable being the turnaround after the vertical loop, which I’ve seen it nearly stall trying to go into on some of my rides. I personally prefer coasters that offer a nice level of g-force and speed consistently throughout, such as Inferno, for example, so while Nemesis’ helix is probably more intense than any individual section of Inferno, for example, I think Inferno maintains a comfortable level of speed and g-force throughout, so I do personally prefer it for that reason. Still, Nemesis is a definite Alton Towers icon, and one of the most unique and admirable coasters in the UK! 7/10, #21 overall
  5. Thirteen - Thirteen may not be “the ultimate rollercoaster” that it was marketed as back in 2010, but it is a fun family roller coaster, in my opinion! There are actually some nice pops of airtime, in my opinion, and it’s blissfully smooth; Intamin & Alton Towers have done a wonderful job on making sure that Thirteen aged well! The ride’s key trick is also very well executed, in my opinion, and the backwards section packs a surprising punch! Overall, if you go down to the woods today, you’ll be sure to get an enjoyable ride out of Thirteen! 6/10, #22 overall
  6. Runaway Mine Train - Runaway Mine Train will always be a special coaster to me, being one of my first ever roller coasters! But even excluding my attachment to it, it is still a pretty great family ride, in my opinion! It has a nice pace to it for a family ride, with sections of it being surprisingly intense; the second helix has no business being on a family coaster! Overall, Runaway Mine Train, while nothing earth-shattering to us enthusiasts, has a really wide appeal, with everyone who rides it seeming to come off with a smile on their face, and surely that’s the most important thing of all? Choo Choo! 6/10, #26 overall
  7. Spinball Whizzer - Spinball Whizzer is a solid family coaster, in my opinion, but I find it a bit too jerky to rank it really highly. The layout is very good, however, and intensity-wise, I think it’s a good stepping-stone coaster! 4/10, #43 overall
  8. Octonauts Rollercoaster Adventure - Octonauts is a good coaster for the younger kids, but I can’t really say an awful lot more than that. It’s quite smooth, and the theming is very nice, I suppose, with a good water effect! 4/10, #49 overall
  9. The Smiler - Smiler is a novel idea, and I think the layout is a brilliant one given the space on offer and the intention of the designers, but I personally find it too rough to really enjoy these days. Most of the elements nowadays have some sort of jolt in them that makes me bang my head against the back of the seat every time, and there’s a very noticeable and persistent vibration. It often makes my head hurt when I get off it, and in all honesty, I’m not really sure if it’s my kind of coaster these days. It’s a wonderful coaster to watch, however! 3/10, #56 overall
  10. Rita - Rita has a great launch, but I seem to remember the rest of the layout being very rough. I admittedly haven’t ridden since April 2016, however; I definitely need a new perspective on it. I think I might go back on it next time I visit Towers. 3/10, #58 overall
I should probably point out that the score out of 10 is on my overall spectrum of enjoyment, and some of the rides would score far more highly on an individual basis (i.e. against similar rides). I should also point out that I have been on a total of 72 different roller coasters, so the overall ranking is out of 72.
Click to expand...
After a visit in September and a general bit of thought, I have a few updates to make to my list, including one that may be particularly eyebrow-raising based on the general opinion of this ride, including my own past opinions...
  1. Wicker Man - no change. (10/10, #3 overall)
  2. Rita - I can hear the gasps from here, and honestly, given that I never used to be a fan of this ride, I was equally surprised when I got off after my most recent ride! I recently decided to re-ride Rita for the first time since April 2016, and before riding, I was not anticipating an enjoyable experience. However, it was very good fun, and I would definitely have gone round again had the queue been shorter! The ride is absolutely supercharged from start to finish, with a great launch to kick things off, and there’s some very good airtime in places! Best of all, the rough ride I remembered was gone; there was a very small rattle, but I didn’t mind as the ride was not painful in the slightest! I was bracing for rough transitions, but they never came, and I frankly couldn’t be more glad! I think the harnesses are still a minor niggle (without them, I think it could quite possibly hit my top 10), but they don’t bother me anywhere near as much as they used to. Overall, Rita massively went up in my estimations after my recent ride, and I certainly hope it’s less than 4.5 years before my next ride! (8/10, #15 overall)
  3. Oblivion - Oblivion was another one I hadn’t ridden in a while, and I don’t know why, as I really like it! My recent ride was no exception; it seems to be one of those coasters that grows on me with every ride, and I absolutely loved what the ride had to offer! The sheer sensation of speed in the tunnel was tremendous, and the drop had some excellent sustained airtime! Oblivion may only have one main trick, but I think it’s one that it executes very well, personally! (8/10, #16 overall)
  4. Galactica - no change. (7/10, #21 overall)
  5. Thirteen - I’ve always enjoyed Thirteen for what it is; even though I don’t find it to be the world’s most intense coaster, I think it’s a very good family coaster that’s very smooth and has some clever tricks up its sleeves! I must admit that it felt a little slower on my recent visit, but that didn’t really take away from it too much for me, and I decided to elevate it above Nemesis for the raw fun factor it consistently provides! (6/10, #24 overall)
  6. Nemesis - no change. (6/10, #25 overall)
  7. Runaway Mine Train - no change. (6/10, #27 overall)
  8. Spinball Whizzer - no change. (4/10, #44 overall)
  9. Octonauts Rollercoaster Adventure - no change. (4/10, #50 overall)
  10. The Smiler - no change. (3/10, #57 overall)
P.S. Sorry for double posting!
 
1. Wicker Man - I think the whole experience on this really elevates the ride.
2. Nemesis - just a great ride with a unique setting.
3. Oblivion - I really enjoy the simplicity of a big drop.
4. Th13teen - I love the ride, but what prevents it from being higher is the extent of the trimming on that first drop. Really kills it.
5. Rita - it's fine, but a great launch
6. Galactica - my favourite flyer, but it's still just fine
7. Smiler - actually loved this when I first rode it, but with age it makes me nauseous (same for all rides tbh). I would rank it between Nemesis and Oblivion if going purely on how much I recall enjoying it in 2014, but I can't justify putting it up there given I've not ridden it recently.
8. Spinball - good fun
9. Runaway Mine Train - ok I guess
 
1. Nemesis - this is easily the best in the park to the point where I subjectively think it’s an objective fact (...?) - the section from the start of the first inversion to the end of the second must surely be one of the most intense sections on any ride? Consistently excellent.

2. Smiler - you can legitimately bash it for roughness but the concept, length and wacky theme carry the ride passed its obvious negative. As awful as it sounds, I think Alton may have a small part of them (the secret, hidden part of you that you don’t share with even your loved ones) that is glad for the accident. Because of that accident, it is perhaps the most ominous ride in the world and that stain of unpleasantness somehow quietly adds to its appeal (in the same way that we are morbidly fascinated with murder mysteries and haunted houses).

3. Wickerman - really quite a drop down from the other two above. A fun ride that fails to truly excel at any particularly thing on a global scale, but remains a fun adventure in its own right.

4. Oblivion - this was a huge spectacle when it opened and yet it has now been succeeded and dwarfed on the global stage to be a mere one trick pony. Outdated and simple, but it can still pack a thrill.

5. Sonic Spinball - far more thrilling and fun that it’s ‘family ride’ label would have you believe. Guarantees a smile, more so than the megadrive game could ever provide.

6. Runaway mine train - a well themed and fun romp with some fair force going into that tunnel.

7. Rita - a genuinely thrilling launch preceding a supremely underwhelming layout. Awkwardly themed and loved by few. Ranked low for not warranting any sort of queue, certainly not the queue times it seems to command.

8. Th13teen - a ride that is merely ‘there’. Horrible scaffolding makes it look cheap and unfinished, blighting the wider experience. Confusing non-sensical theming (in relation to the ride experience) and a twist with little post-reveal appeal. Did you ever see that M. Night Shyamalan film ‘The Village’? Yeah.

9. Air - outdated and uncomfortable. A precursor for greater things. Ultimately beige and rather sexless; one may struggle to become aroused if he/she has ridden Air in recent times. The ‘airing cupboard’ of Alton Towers.
 
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1. Nemesis - I always seem to forget how good this one is until I get back on it. Holds top place for me just for the intensity factor and of course the crazy terrain its built in.

2. The Smiler - Was always close on being a tie with Nemesis but after riding it recently, it's definitely my 2nd favourite there. Seemed much rougher than I remember last time but still packs a punch....plus the theme is great!

3. Wicker Man - Got on it for the first time this year. Set my hopes low as I knew it was just a family GCI and after being disappointed by the other UK investment, Icon, I certainly wasn't expecting much. But, I was wrong! Wicker Man proved to be a pleasant surprise. Short but sweet, and the main s-bend drop was pretty intense. Loved the theme and the effects within the station were awesome too.

4. Oblivion - The first time I went on this I was disappointed but the more I go on, the more I appreciate it for what it was when it was first built. Only reason it's below Wicker Man is because I feel like the theme is fairly weak on it and seems to be a one-trick pony.

5. Th13teen - I always struggle to choose which one I prefer over this and Rita however due to the slightly longer duration, free-fall section and theming, I feel that this coaster has the better experience.

6. Rita - Don't get me wrong, the launch is great....but the rest is just a basic coaster. I feel like if this had lap-bars, I'd probably get some better pops of airtime over the tallest section, but apart from that, it's just a launch coaster and nothing else.

7. Galactica - Always the last one I go to. Used to love it for it's unique theming back when it was Air. The area had a great atmosphere to it especially with that awesome soundtrack. But over the years it seems to have gotten more and more outdated especially since getting on Manta at SeaWorld. I also find the theme to be a bit boring and it doesn't seem to fit well in the Forbidden Valley.

I hope that one day, either Rita or Galactica are taken down and replaced with a coaster that is much more intense, filled with airtime and hopefully stands out from the rest of the coasters at AT for all the right reasons :)
 
1.) Nemesis- This coaster is intense! It's such a good coaster with good interactions with the terrain, picks up it's speed out of nowhere has a really good atmosphere round the area and inside the station with a brilliant layout and it's definitely a back row ride for those who want a very intense experience!
2.) The Smiler- What a crazy coaster, the first time i stepped onto this ride i was blown away and recently it's been a bit more smooth, however what prevents it from being no.1 is the cobra roll and the fact that the track looks tired and like Oblivion needs a bit of a refresh!
3.) Wicker Man- One of the best themed coasters in the UK and it's got some good airtime and has a decent layout for a GCI. No complaints here tbh.
4.) Oblivion- Short but sweet, it has a brilliant first drop that pulls some really good Gs and just needs a paint of the track!
5.) Galactica- It's got the best soundtrack on the park which boosts it but the transitions and it's gentle experience push it down for me.
6.) Th13teen- Very well themed, with a good forceful drop and a brilliant soundtrack, just a bit too short for my liking.
7.) Spinball Whizzer- A good fun coaster however if you have long legs (like me), then you can bash them into the side of the car on the brake run which hurts.
8.) Runaway Mine Train- A good fun ride for the kiddies and young families but just can't live up to most of the big coaster let's be honest!
9.) Rita- Terrible when i recently rode it, gave my shoulders a bit off pain and also my neck after the launch
Still haven't ridden Octaunauts? even though i tried to last time...
 
1 - The Smiler - The best ride in the British Isles. Even better than Cu Chulainn
2 - Wickerman - Best woodie in Europe, my second being Colossos
3 - Nemesis - Easily the best B&M Invert since Dragon Challenge went defunct
4 - Oblivion - Doesn't this have the biggest drop height : lift the height ratio of any coaster?
5 - Rita - People give this ride too much crap, I really enjoyed it when I visited when the smiler opened
6 - Galactica - A very mediocre flying coaster. I'd put it above the vekoma flying dutchman but below the superman ultimate flight models
7 - Thirteen - It's just.... okay
8 - Spinball Whizzer - I am OFFENDED by how dizzy I got from this. I get motion sickness easily so I don't usually ride spinning coasters but I made an exception for some reason
I skipped the rides you didn't see
 
Hi everyone. I'm a new member and having been to Alton Towers yesterday I thought I'd add my two pennies to this:

1. Nemesis. I remember this opening in 1994. We were lucky enough every summer to go to Alton Towers on school trips and we'd run straight to this ride to avoid the inevitably 3 hour queue that would develop. As a ride it remains the brilliant ride that I have such fond memories of from those school trips years ago. The helix is probably my favourite individual element on any coaster. In my view its surprisingly smooth and the theme and the way its built down into the rock is just amazing. On the rare occasions when a night ride is available its such an amazing experience

2. Galactica (It will always be Air to me). I enjoyed this ride more than I remember. I seemed to remember it being a forceless dull ride, and whilst I do prefer Manta, it is a more forceful ride than I remember.

3. Oblivion. It has one job to do, and it does it about as well as a Coaster can. That first drop is immense. It holds you for just long enough and the fact that you cannot see the bottom really adds to the suspense. I actually prefer this to SheiKra.

4. Smiler. It is a rough ride, and the succession of dive loops actually is a touch boring, but otherwise its not a bad ride. Yes the 14 inversions is a bit gimmicky, and it probably would be a better ride had they stuck at 11 or 12,

5. Rita. Much maligned, unfairly in my view. Clearly the launch is nowhere near as intense as Stealth, and if this ride was just about the launch it would be a very poor ride, bunt actually like the ride that follows.

6. Wicker Man. Shock horror I know, down in 6th. And even then only on a toss up between this and Thirteen. Its probably my own fault and it probably fell to the curse of the milestone. I organised this summers trips to allow me to get my 100th cred by riding Wicker Man. As a result I'd built it up and for me it was meh. Whilst the theming is amazing, the ride itself just did nothing amazing for me.

7. Th13teen. Its okay. The first section was fine, albeit it ruined slightly by the trims even on the first drop. Even though I knew what to expect the drop was a surprise and quite good. The backwards section was nowhere near as good as say Expedition Everest. This one disappoints me as I felt it could be so much more.

8. Mine train. I went on it. I remember almost nothing else. Its the beige of the roller coaster world.

9. Octonauts ride. Really rather good... for a Kiddie Coaster

10. Spinball Whizzer. Hideous. Painful. Not fun. Terrible break run. Not something I ever want to ride again
 
Here’s my ranking :D

1: Nemesis
Sadly still my favourite Coaster in the UK ( will it ever be beaten ? ) great theming and a strong forceful layout make this easily my No1 UK coaster.

2: Wicker man
My favourite theme at towers and I like the forces, but it’s a shame it’s not bigger and the room at the start and end could be used better.

3: Oblivion
Great drop that is probably my favourite moment on any coaster at towers but that’s it, a drop and turn.

4: Galactica
A great coaster to give you a free relaxed feeling, it nice to have chill on.

5: Runaway mine train
A must ride for me as I love the interaction with the rapids and speeding through the station and tunnel, it’s a family coaster that is perfect for its target audience, I still find it great fun.

6: Th13teen
This coaster always feels off to me, an ok outdoor section, good drop, and an ok wobbley bit in the dark, but it looks unfinished and poorly executed and i don’t like the slow bit back to the station, they could have done a lot more.

7: Smiler
This is like going to a nightclub for me, I know I’m gonna have a megh to bad time and no matter what something bad will happen so I cannot enjoy it. Inversion 12 always wacks my head leaving a bad taste in my mouth ( like a hangover ) this could be one of my faves if it had lap bars only.

8: Rita
Good launch but a uncomfortable dull ride makes it drop down my rank, again lap bars only would make this so much better.

9: Spinball
I forget this is exists, at the end of a day I end up walking past this each time and going “oh yea that’s here” I think I did it twice and thought it was megh.

10: Octonauts
Ha whale go sploosh.
 
1. Nemesis
It is an absolute masterpiece. A layout that only gets more intense as the ride progresses coupled with one of the most incredible settings of a coaster.

2. Smiler
It's a bumpy ride, but far more intense than I ever expected.

3. Rita
Great little launched coaster. It packs a nice punch with some good whips and airtime, but is simply too short to be ranked higher.

4. Spinball Whizzer
One of the best Maurer spinners I've experienced. By comparison to most spinners, the cars hauled through the unique layout. A ton of fun.

5. Oblivion
For a one-trick pony, it was more enjoyable than expected. Nevertheless, it is still an extremely short ride.

6. Galactica
I only experienced it during the VR days. The VR was decent, but the headset was quite painful (I have a fairly large beak) and really took away from the enjoyment of the ride. I have a feeling I would rate it better without VR.

7. Th13teen
It's fine, if not a little bipolar. It's an okay coaster that is only meant to provide some sort of substance before the freefall. Not a bad ride. Just not especially great.

8. Runaway Mine Train
Enjoyable for what it is.
 
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Went a bit more in-depth than I expected, but here ya go:

1. Smiler
An absolute marvel of Engineering and ride design. Intense enough to match the US parks, it doesn't fall into the merlin trap of incredibly short ride times because all the money was spent on theming (glares at Wicker man). The layout is varied and very well paced between each half, with the natural duelling of the trains between each half giving a visual treat both off and onride. The theming is fantastically done with a fascinating yet sinister theme that doesn't feel tacky despite the sea of concrete the ride is built on. Though it could definitely be smoother and the queue line is torturous, it's still the best ride in the UK.

Also, the roar of the track beats B&M's any day of the week. ?
2. Nemesis
The classic terrain invert. An incredible setting, magical pacing, colossal elements that interact with just about everything. Watching pov's really don't do justice how fast and how close to the ground you really are. Riding in the back row at night was probably the last time I was genuinely scared on a rollercoaster. Though, it is a very short experience despite what it manages to do with the terrain. And, frankly, while the idea behind the theme is pretty awesome, the ride desperately needs a theming overhaul. The station now just looks tacky, and given the talent and standards Alton Towers has, they could do wonders with the same concept nowadays if they really invested.
3. Wicker man
A tiny, fun little wooden ride that would be a fairly disappointing experience given the marketing hype and investment. But its absoutely made up for by the theming. Its gorgeous, and a joy to watch within the queueline (the queue itself is a welcome U-turn from smiler's cages). The theme is sinister but fun because of just how dramatic it is and how they hype up the ride experience, it makes up for the short layout with just how much fun the whole experience is.
4. Oblivion
A one trick pony, but it never gets old. The drop is absolutely amazing, with its build up being slow and enjoyably scary. This would probably be lower if it also didnt chew through queues, I'm not sure if I've ever waited for more than 40 minutes for it, while smiler regularly sits at 70-100 minutes running 4 trains
5. Spinball
I'm always put off by the astronomical queue and usually skip it, but the ride is an absolute laugh. Its awesome for families and a great stepping stone between Th13teen and Wicker man. Though I wouldn't be surprised if this was taken out soon for something quieter and with a more prominent theme.
6. Rita
I've liked this less and less over the years. The hydraulic launch is awesome and justifies it's place in the park (even if Stealth's is MUCH better), but the layout is rough and incredibly boring. The theme is a half-arsed conversion with mostly plywood and scaffolding. And I don't know what on earth management changed, but the operations are just abysmal. 1 train running as standard is not good enough for the largest park in the country, so its now not worth the wait when you have better rides just around the corner.
7. Th13teen
An awesome innovation for family rides and a worthy experiment by Intamin and the park. But it doesn't make for much of a family ride when the coaster section is so short, and the stop-start nature of the ride makes it feel pretty underwhelming. It still gave a better drop than Sub-terra though, and I still ride it more than Rita.
8. Galactica
Massively innovative, and they did what they could with the height difference. But this is sadly a boring ride that gets uncomfortable by the end, the new theme is tacky (though the music is awesome), and the operations have also been dismal for the past few years (Not blaming the attendants, it seems to be a new policy to run at half capacity). It was a perfect addition at the time, but it hasn't aged well and the land could be better used with a new innovation that better fits the area theme.
9. Runaway mine train
... Its boring. Absolutely fine for families, but I've ridden it only a few times in the 10-15 visits I've made here; and I've always thought I'd have better spent my time walking on to forbidden valley and waiting 30 seconds for Duel on the way.

I haven't ridden Octonauts, but it looks like a great first-rollercoaster. Alton towers is a fantastic park, and their focus on investing in solely in park upkeep before Wicker man has made it a wonderful place to visit and stay over at.
 
Might as well chip in.

1/ Nemesis
Classic B&M invert that maintains enjoyment and re-ride ability despite it’s age. Towers please jet wash though!

2/ Wickerman
I know it’s not the biggest of the fastest, but I simply adore this coaster. Great theme, setting and surprisingly re-rideable too.

3/ Oblivion
One could argue it’s a one trick pony, but I still haven’t been on a dive coaster with such an intimidating and forceful drop. Video and aesthetics could do with an upgrade though.

4/ Thirteen
The drop and backwards launch are still surprising and enjoyable today as they were on my first ride. The beginning half may not be extravagant but I still like it for there is. It’s a surprising throughput machine when it doesn’t break or there is a pandemic.

5/ Galactica/Air
Somewhat more relaxing than thrilling, but it gives a nice interaction of the Forbidden Valley area. The portal theming is decent for what it is.

6/ Smiler
It‘s impressive to look at and has given the park what is arguably its most distinctive coaster in 15 years (since it’s opening), but it honestly looks a mess and is rather bumpy in places. Not to mention those horrible jolts towards the end of the ride.

7/ Spinball Whizzer
Whilst it isn’t the best ride of it’s kind it still provides a largely fun and enjoyable coaster towards the family sector of the park. The ride would be better received if in an alternative location most likely.

8/ Runaway Mine Train
It interacts with the surrounding area well, travels at a decent pace for what it is and is one of the better examples of a powered coaster. If it didn’t get the crazy queues I’d probably ride it more than I do.

9/ Rita
There are some good Intamin launch coasters out there. This isn’t one of them. It is rough, jolty,uncomftable and controversially even boring. It always has a long queue which is weird and the only main coaster I usually don’t bother riding there.

10/ Octonauts
It’s a kids coaster. It’s not the best but not the worst one either, but probably makes the kids happy which is all it needs to do.
 
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1) Nemesis, a coaster actually worthy of the hype. Arguably one of the best of its kind which cant really be said for any other ride in the UK.

2) Wickerman, great theatrics and theming and being a modern wooden coaster completely unique on the UK scene. I wish it was bigger and bolder but that doesn't detract from what it does do.

3) Smiler, rides fantastically at times, ok at others. The second airtime hill would be my favorite element on a UK coaster if the restraints didn't butcher it. Burn the last inversion.

4) Spinball, Higher than most people may expect but for me its a ton of fun and the only major coaster in the park not to have dark undertones in its theme which is a welcome respite.

5) Thirteen, Fun little family coaster with a well executed "surprise" element. I wish the outdoor section wasn't trimmed and much longer but still a solid addition.

6) Rita, A fun launch followed by some strong airtime moments, The restraints do kill the airtime somewhat but i still think its a little underrated by enthusiasts.

7) Oblivion, fantastic forceful drop that never fails to get the blood pumping, as a big lad the restraints have historically been a snag for me, so controversially i'd rank it higher if it had vests.

8) Galactica, Alton towers worst major coaster? a little harsh maybe. unfortunately for me it suffers from prototype syndrome and is a little under baked.

9) Octonauts, a fun family coaster with a cute theme and even some special effects, well executed for what it is and glass smooth.

10) The runaway mine train, Don't ask me why but i just don't get on with the ride, its dull, usually has a big queue and in general is a bit pants. Ill only ever ride if its walk on or i haven't done it by the end of the season
 
1: Nemesis: I WANT this to be beaten as the best UK coaster, but it just doesn't seem to be happening. It's no longer my global No.1, but it's a solid feature of my top 5 and I don't see that changing anytime soon. Nemesis is one of those rare examples where they just got everything right.

2: Oblivion: I wish it was longer, it's basically a drop tower in some ways, but Dive Machines are all about that drop, and Oblivion does it like no other.

3: Smiler: I always forget about the airtime hills, which is always a nice surprise. Also, from an engineering standpoint, the thing is frankly audacious.

4: Wicker Man: Fun, but compared to other woodies it falls short. I rank Ghostrider and Wodan much higher than this, if we're talking woodies with millennium flyers. I guess Alton's height limit plays a part in this, but they built Nemesis within those constraints. Speaking honestly however, I'm never quite sure if it was worth losing the flume for...

5: Air/Galactica: It's tame, but just plain fun. I prefer the old theme and music, but I appreciate they wanted to refresh an old ride.

6: Thirteen: This could be a really great coaster if the woodland section was longer and untrimmed.

7: Spinball Whizzer: Doesn't do anything particularly special, other Maurer Spinners have better tricks up their sleeves but I'll ride it once.

8: Mine Train: Choo Choo, I love the interaction with the Rapids. Feels like a proper Theme Park attraction and an integral part of Alton Towers' themeing pre-Merlin.

9: Rita: Good launch, not as good as others... that's about it.

Not ridden Octonauts.

I wont rank the defunct rides, but I imagine Corkscrew wouldn't hold up anymore. I loved the Ug Land theme when that was new and had a good selection of flats to boot... flats... remember them? The Black Hole was always more fun than I expected it to be as well, and I miss it, and it won't be the same in its relocation outside. Didn't ride the other defuncts.
 
I actually have an update to this after my recent April visit to Towers. For reference, here’s the list I had previously:
Matt N said:
After a visit in September and a general bit of thought, I have a few updates to make to my list, including one that may be particularly eyebrow-raising based on the general opinion of this ride, including my own past opinions...
  1. Wicker Man - no change. (10/10, #3 overall)
  2. Rita - I can hear the gasps from here, and honestly, given that I never used to be a fan of this ride, I was equally surprised when I got off after my most recent ride! I recently decided to re-ride Rita for the first time since April 2016, and before riding, I was not anticipating an enjoyable experience. However, it was very good fun, and I would definitely have gone round again had the queue been shorter! The ride is absolutely supercharged from start to finish, with a great launch to kick things off, and there’s some very good airtime in places! Best of all, the rough ride I remembered was gone; there was a very small rattle, but I didn’t mind as the ride was not painful in the slightest! I was bracing for rough transitions, but they never came, and I frankly couldn’t be more glad! I think the harnesses are still a minor niggle (without them, I think it could quite possibly hit my top 10), but they don’t bother me anywhere near as much as they used to. Overall, Rita massively went up in my estimations after my recent ride, and I certainly hope it’s less than 4.5 years before my next ride! (8/10, #15 overall)
  3. Oblivion - Oblivion was another one I hadn’t ridden in a while, and I don’t know why, as I really like it! My recent ride was no exception; it seems to be one of those coasters that grows on me with every ride, and I absolutely loved what the ride had to offer! The sheer sensation of speed in the tunnel was tremendous, and the drop had some excellent sustained airtime! Oblivion may only have one main trick, but I think it’s one that it executes very well, personally! (8/10, #16 overall)
  4. Galactica - no change. (7/10, #21 overall)
  5. Thirteen - I’ve always enjoyed Thirteen for what it is; even though I don’t find it to be the world’s most intense coaster, I think it’s a very good family coaster that’s very smooth and has some clever tricks up its sleeves! I must admit that it felt a little slower on my recent visit, but that didn’t really take away from it too much for me, and I decided to elevate it above Nemesis for the raw fun factor it consistently provides! (6/10, #24 overall)
  6. Nemesis - no change. (6/10, #25 overall)
  7. Runaway Mine Train - no change. (6/10, #27 overall)
  8. Spinball Whizzer - no change. (4/10, #44 overall)
  9. Octonauts Rollercoaster Adventure - no change. (4/10, #50 overall)
  10. The Smiler - no change. (3/10, #57 overall)
P.S. Sorry for double posting!
Click to expand...
And here’s my list now:
  1. Wicker Man - WM is still a phenomenal wooden coaster, in my view! Even though it’s not a huge g-machine, it delivers pure fun every time for me, and seems to get a little better with each ride I have on it; even my most recent ride in the front row, while not quite as strong as the changing rides I had on it in summer 2020, was still absolutely phenomenal, and definitely still an absolutely superb experience! Blisteringly fast pace throughout, surprisingly strong pops of airtime scattered in the most unexpected of places, really comfortable and rerideable (as far as woodies go); what’s not to like? The only slight problem I could find last time that did knock it down ever so slightly was a slight rough patch toward the end (during the final wicker man pass through) that left me feeling a little bashed up compared to usual, but this was a tiny, tiny spot that is by no means a deal breaker; the rest of it is still very comfortable, and I still absolutely adore Wicker Man! Definitely still my favourite coaster at Alton Towers! (no change, 9/10, #4 overall)
  2. Oblivion - Given that Oblivion is very much the sort of coaster that hones in on one gimmick and the element of fear surrounding it, you’d think that it would lose its touch once you’ve ridden it lots of times. Well if anything, I’m happy to say that Oblivion has hugely grown on me over time, and I don’t know what it was on last time I rode, because my last ride was genuinely quite breathtaking! The airtime on the drop was strong, sustained and just generally absolutely sublime, and then the sense of speed through the tunnel was like nothing else, with a nice bonus pop of airtime into the brake run to top it all off! Ultimately, I think Oblivion is still a little too short to be right up there, and I think SheiKra does still usurp it ever so slightly due to the bonus elements that it has (although it’s years since I’ve done SheiKra, so I’d have to reride to be completely sure), but Oblivion definitely shot into the top 10 after that amazing ride! On a pound-for-pound basis, Oblivion delivers everything I could possibly want from it! (+1, 9/10, #9 overall)
  3. Nemesis - As much as I don’t think Nemesis does as much for me now as it once did, I still absolutely love it, and I’ll admit that it’s a hard coaster for me not to appreciate! There’s just so much to like about it, in my opinion; the layout is so unique, with some great moments, the pit and the rockwork really do add quite a bit to it, and it’s also aged pretty well too! My last ride on it was really quite good; just the right level of force, and no headbanging! Ultimately, though, something I’ve begun to find with inverted coasters is that I’m not sure they really do as much for me as they used to unless you’re sat up front, as in all the other rows, you can only really see the seats in front of you, and can’t really get a feel for the surroundings, if you get what I mean; I do think that the front row is definitely my favourite seat on Nemesis, simply because you really feel very exposed to the surroundings up front! On the whole, though, Nemesis is a ride that I definitely really enjoy, and even if I don’t rank it as highly as most, I definitely see why it’s so loved! (+3, 9/10, #11 overall)
  4. Rita - I used to not like Rita very much at all, but I’ll admit it’s really grown on me again on recent rides! It’s seemed nowhere near as rough as it used to be; it hasn’t hurt at all on any of my recent rides! That layout is also just absolutely supercharged, with a great launch, some excellent ejector airtime pops, and some nice high-speed corners! Granted, it’s still a tiny bit rattly, and I think it would improve if it had lap bars, but it’s a far cry from the brutal coaster I remember from a few years ago! (-2, 7/10, #20 overall)
  5. Galactica - Galactica, although not the most intense by any means, is still a really nice ride that I personally enjoy; it’s very smooth, very rerideable, and has some nice swoopy twists and turns! However, it has dropped a fair bit for me in recent times; I used to love it more. I’ll admit I’m not a huge lover of the fly-to-lie element; while it’s much more palatable for me than the excessive positive-g fest of Manta’s pretzel loop, I still personally find the sensation of blood rushing to your head for a sustained period of time somewhat uncomfortable. Also, I’m ultimately growing less sure about how much I actually rate flying coasters as a general ride type; while it’s a cool novelty, I do personally find the riding position quite constraining by nature with all the leg restraints and big vests, and they can’t really provide the type of more varied ride experience with some negative g-forces on offer that I’m growing more into. Still, Galactica is a perfectly pleasant coaster that I always enjoy riding! (-1, 7/10, #23 overall)
  6. Thirteen - Thirteen is a really fun family coaster, in my opinion! It’s very smooth, has some nice pops of floater airtime and twists in the outdoor section, and the drop track and backwards section are always good for a laugh! However, while I’m not sure if this is caused by social distancing and the reduced weight on the trains, the ride seems to have felt a bit slower on recent rides. Still, Thirteen is a fun little ride that’s always a fun little jaunt, in my opinion! (-1, 7/10, #25 overall)
  7. Runaway Mine Train - I feel as though I should like this far less than I do, but I just find it a phenomenal amount of fun for what it is! It just has such a wide appeal; whether you’re a small child riding your first coaster, a thrill-seeking teen/young adult or a grandparent who perhaps doesn’t like the big thrills as much anymore, you’re bound to come off Runaway Mine Train with a smile on your face; I know I certainly do! The ride packs a surprising punch in places; it feels way faster than the billed 22mph in parts of the layout, and the two helixes, especially the one into the tunnel, are certainly very fun and punchy! Overall, RMT, while it isn’t the most groundbreaking or thrilling coaster, provides something for everybody, and it’s a hugely special ride to me from a sentimental standpoint, what with it being one of my first ever coasters! Choo Choo! (no change, 6/10, #30 overall)
  8. Spinball Whizzer - I recently got back on Spinball for the first time since 2017, and I have to admit that it was more fun than I’d remembered! While I’d previously remembered quite a jerky, rough ride, it didn’t seem anywhere near as bad, and it has some fun helixes and turns! On the whole, it’s not my favourite coaster, as it does make me feel a little bit dizzy coming off, but it’s certainly a fun family coaster that’s worth your while, in my opinion! (no change, 6/10, #36 overall)
  9. The Smiler - Oh, I really want to like Smiler more than I do. I actually have a lot to owe to it, as following its construction was the very thing that got me into this hobby, and I find it utterly fascinating, in many ways! It’s an absolute engineering marvel; how Gerstlauer and Alton Towers fit so much into so little space is beyond me, and considering the ride has 14 inversions, the layout is absolutely relentless, very creative and never feels too repetitive, with each inversion providing a different sensation from the one that preceded it! In layout terms, I actually really admire it. However, it’s ultimately a bit too uncomfortable for me to rank highly; while it’s not nearly as rough as the likes of Saw at Thorpe Park, it’s still got quite a pronounced rattle and a couple of notable bumpy bits. The ending in particular is pretty rough and leaves a bit of a sour taste in my mouth when getting off. I’m also not a huge lover of the restraints; I can’t quite put my finger on why, but something just feels a bit odd and uncomfortable about them compared with the OTSRs from the likes of B&M. Overall, Smiler is definitely an admirable ride, and I’ll admit that my last ride I had on it in the front row wasn’t too rough compared to some I’ve had on it, but ultimately, I still find it a bit too rough for my personal liking, and because of this, I’m afraid it’s not one of my favourite coasters. It’s a shame, as if it were smoother and had more comfortable restraints, I actually think I’d rank it quite highly in this list! (+1, 5/10, #42 overall)
  10. Octonauts Rollercoaster Adventure - I actually think this is a really nicely done coaster for what it is, with some great theming and a well-designed experience, but it is ultimately a roller coaster designed for small children, which unfortunately inhibits how highly I can really rank it. (-1, 3/10, #59 overall)
 
So i would like to say that i believe Alton have a great lineup of coasters in my opinion, and deciding the numbering of the top three was very difficult and every visit my ranking of the three always change. Anyways..

1.The Smiler- This one is very close with Nemesis, but i believe it is a more full package. This ride in my opinion was one of the most recent examples of Merlin getting it right. The theme is sinister sure, but it is also very constrasting to Merlin's usual drab themes, as the ride is literally themed to joy. The yellow on the trains, the jacked up laughing music which sets such a great scene- it is a unique creation by Merlin, not a IP. A true legit interesting theme with a scare maze to flesh out its backstory. The theming elements are great throughout the ride, with the music blasting as the trains dispatch, the dentist-style white of the station, the exit being trippy in itself. The ride offers such an atmosphere, and i am not even talking about the main coaster yet. I also want to mention the Marmaliser and the near misses it creates.

The main ride itself is very long (in constrast to rides like Swarm), it is very intense (unlike Swarm), and overall is a coaster with a very creative and unique layout. The ride's 'staffordshire knot' and its resembelance to the logo is a great example of how great the track placing is on this beast. The ride experience has a few jarring moments but i do believe after some rides it is easy to brace for them (its really just the end of that cobra roll). The ride also has two good airtime moments, and the ride experience can only be described as chaotic.

2. Nemesis- This is an amazing B&M. It has great forces, a unqiue layout, and it just feels intense up until you hit the breaks. The ride's use of terrain is amazing, other people have summed it up better to be fair. The only reason i do not rank it higher is due to The Smiler being a better package (ride length, music, ect). But Nemesis is amazing in its own right, and is a top tier invert.

3. Wickerman- This is exactly what the park needed back in 2018 IMO. Wickerman is a such a brilliant coaster, it has great pacing, great classic GCI laterals and pops of airtime. It may be small, but it is a fun GCI that really fills an important part in Alton's lineup. The theming is also world class, with the statue being a highlight. The ride also really is very reridable, and i believe the ride really gives complete different experiences depending on the row (the back row is certainly NOT family friendly lol).
I think a reason to why i do not rank this higher is that i rode Wodan before this, which is double the height and a lot more intense. But it still a brilliant GCI with theming that is great.

4. Galactica- To be honest even i under-rate this coaster sometimes. Sure it is one of the most tame flying coasters, but it never fails to be anything short of extemely enjoyable IMO. The ride has some really fun elements like the fly to the lie, and the inline twist. The ride also really has a great setting, which makes this a LOT better than the Superman clones IMO. I like flying coasters a lot, and Air-lactica is still a very fun coaster. If it was at Thorpe, i would ride it all the time.

5. Oblivion- One trick pony, but that trick is done so damn well. That drop is amazing, you get airtime, you also have the huge tunnel which makes it feel even more insane. Despite having one element, i prefer it to Valravn. It was the first dive coaster, but it still holds up as a fun ride, as short as it may be. The music and buildup also are amazing, the 90s dance music should be a element on RCDB.

6. Thirteen- This is a great family coaster. It has a fun drop, a fun little section around the woods. And an amazing drop track and backwards section. It is a little short, but like Galactica It is a very fun coaster, it is not intense. But it is always a ride i look forward to riding at Alton Towers.

7. Spinball- I love this and fury- intense and fun spinning coasters. This one is not quite as good as its brother, but it still a very fun coaster and a great support ride for this park.

8. Rita- Put the intamin soft straps on this ride and it would be great. But in its current form, it is a launch followed by some pain. It is still a good ride do not get me wrong, it has a very forceful launch that is always fun to experience, but sadly it gets lost in Altons lineup.

9. RMT- This is probably one of the best mack powered coasters, it has great theming and interaction with the area and the rapids. Alpine Coaster Enzian is the only powered coaster that i think is better. It is a great coaster in its own right.

10. Octonauts- credit who**

Overall a very well rounded lineup, i do not believe a single coaster at this park is bad. Even Rita has some very redeemable features.
 
As my opinions are seemingly ever-changing, I have made a few marginal updates to my list following my visit yesterday, as well as a bit of general thought about these rankings. I’ve italicised any rides that I’ve moved around:
  1. Wicker Man - It’s still my favourite ride at Alton by a fair distance, and yesterday’s visit only exacerbated that, to be honest! I had my first ever ride in row 12, and it was obscenely fantastic; the ride was hurling us round corners at what felt like breakneck speed, and with the insane ejector airtime, it literally felt like a bucking bronco! The back row lap was possibly one of the most airtime-filled rides I’ve ever had on a UK coaster, and I was screaming my way round it; I still had a huge smile on my face and a spring in my step by the time we were getting on Runaway Mine Train! As much as I’m raving about the back row, though, even the 2 laps I had in row 4 were breathtaking! To top it all off, the rough patch I nitpicked about last time was non-existent yesterday; the ride was nice and comfortable all the way round! Overall, you’ve probably heard enough about my thoughts on Wicker Man by now, but my rides yesterday topped July 2020 as my favourite experiences I’ve ever had on Wicker Man; it was honestly breathtaking, and I’m tempted to go even further and say it might well be my favourite UK coaster after my experiences yesterday. I’m undecided between it and Icon, as while Icon is more my usual style, Wicker Man was running so amazingly yesterday I almost think it deserves a promotion. What do you guys think? 10/10, #3 overall, no change
  2. Oblivion - Nothing’s drastically changed compared to my last experience on this, to be honest. 9/10, #7 overall, no change
  3. Nemesis - Ditto with above, although I wouldn’t say I enjoyed yesterday’s ride quite as much as my last one due to there being some slight headbanging compared to my last run. 8/10, #13 overall, no change
  4. Galactica - I do have a real soft spot for Galactica, I’ll admit! Even though I haven’t ridden since July 2020, I decided to bump it back up after a bit of thought, as it’s such a nice, smooth, fun coaster that always puts a smile on my face! However, I’ll admit it would be even higher if it didn’t have that fly-to-lie element at the start; even though I find this element a lot more palatable forces-wise than the pretzel loop on Manta, I find being on your back for that extended period with the blood rushing to your head a tad uncomfortable. Overall, though, Galactica is still such a fun ride that never fails to put a smile on my face! 8/10, #17 overall, +1
  5. Rita - Rita was never one I used to particularly enjoy, but it’s seemed a lot smoother lately, so has had somewhat of a renaissance within my rankings as of late! However, the reason I decided to drop it is because my April 2021 ride seemed a tad more rattly, and didn’t do quite as much for me as the September 2020 ride. Rita is still a far cry from the rough and painful rides I used to have, though! 7/10, #19 overall, -1
  6. Runaway Mine Train - RMT is such a guilty pleasure of mine! Even though we were towards the front of the train on my most recent ride (row 7), it was still really fast and fun; those helixes, especially the last one, are amazing, and feel a lot faster than they probably are! The ride is also pretty rerideable, and tracks surprisingly smoothly for a coaster of its age! Overall, as much as it’s probably criminal that I rank Runaway Mine Train above 4 other coasters at Alton Towers, including 2 SW coasters, it’s just so fun and always puts a smile on my face every time I ride! In that sense, I almost feel like I’m under-ranking it, but I feel like #26 is probably the highest I could justify, as if it went any higher it would be above the likes of Expedition Everest (Everest is currently only one spot higher than RMT)! But in conclusion; RMT is really, really fun! Choo Choo! 6/10, #26 overall, +1
  7. Thirteen - I do like Thirteen, and I think it’s a fun, remarkably smooth family coaster, so in a sense, I almost feel bad ranking it so lowly, but my reason for dropping it is because I do think it’s felt a little disappointing on my recent rides. I’m not sure if this is related to COVID/the reduced capacity on the trains or not, but my last ride in April 2021 did feel somewhat sluggish; the ride had less of its regular floater pops, and it even felt like it was limping somewhat through the usually fairly vigorous backwards section. Don’t get me wrong, though; Thirteen is still an enjoyable family coaster, and I wouldn’t be too surprised if it ends up being boosted back up a bit once I’m able to ride it with full trains again! 6/10, #28 overall, -1
  8. The Smiler - In spite of the fact I appreciate it as a feat of engineering, and I’m still quite mesmerised by it even 8 years on, I’ll admit Smiler isn’t my favourite coaster. I’ll admit, however, that it wasn’t running badly at all on my ride yesterday; I was sat in the front row, and aside from the usual suspects (the ending was quite rough, and there were 1 or 2 other jolts in bits of the layout), the ride was generally quite smooth, with little more than a very slight rattle during the rest of it! However, with that being said, I would still enjoy Smiler more if those jolts weren’t there. Also, even though I do appreciate the relentlessness and creativity of the layout, and I definitely see why people like Smiler, I think the ride is possibly a little too intense/nauseating in its execution to be one of my favourite coasters. 6/10, #33 overall, +1
  9. Spinball Whizzer - On my last ride in April 2021, Spinball was not as bad as I’d remembered, and was smoother than I’d previously remembered with a good layout, but as I have a somewhat weak stomach when it comes to spinny rides, the rapid, lurching transitions in certain parts of the layout and the general spinniness (is that a word?) was a little dizzying, and did make me feel a tiny bit queasy after my last ride. Still, I think it’s a reasonable family coaster! 5/10, #39 overall, -1
  10. Octonauts Rollercoaster Adventure - No major change. 3/10, #59 overall, no change
 
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