EnigmaHyena
Hyper Poster
It doesn't have a touch screen, it doesn't have very good internet and it doesn't have a thousand apps. It DOES however have a 2MP camera, nifty design and plays music with a rich, deep bassy sound. All of which I don't actually care about. All I care about is that I can use it to phone/text people.
I can see why it's VERY handy to have a swish phone with excellent internet access, but it'd be pretty damn nice if people weren't glued to their phones that mummy and daddy probably bought all the bloody time now.