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Try to use it as a fertilizer in your garden. Alternatively you could grow plants in your bed.

I tried to cool down my computer by filling it with ice cubes, now it doesn't react anymore. What did I do wrong and how can I fix it?
 
34 feminists, however they can't change anything (prays not to trigger anyone who doesn't get my sarcastic type of humour)..

Why do planes need wings if cars have triangular biceps?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
Planes have wings to trick geese into thinking that they're a giant bird. That way, the geese get caught in the turbines.

My niece wants a Hitler-themed birthday party but I can't find any stores with the proper decorations. Should I just scrap the idea and go with Stalin?
 
I'd recommend a party themed to Kim Jong Un. You could celebrate directly in North Korea. Maybe he even attends the party?

Why do we have two nostrils instead of one bigger nostril?
 
Because it would be lonely.

Why are things not quite as the seem when they look different from what they are?
 
Optics.

Why are you not riding a roller coaster right now when you are on a roller coaster forum?
 
They're an efficient yet fun way of murdering gardeners.

My pet pixie is starting to smell. Any advice?
 
That depends on the color of the egg.

How can I get the attention of my fridge? I really want to get closer to it...
 
Start banging your microwave. Your Fridge won't be able to resist you when she sees another beautiful kitchen appliance on your arm.

Am I supposed to scoop the cats out of the cradle with a silver spoon? I've only got plastic ones....
 
Once you get Little Boy Blue onto the Moon, I know we'll have a good time then.

If I'm colorblind, do traffic lights still apply?
 
When a bird and a bee love each other very much, they **** and create a horrible abomination. It's half bird and half bee- a Beerd.

Why is Frollo so angry?
 
Because he smokes magical pony island tricki tricki woos weed crack that has an effect that makes people angry after the high.

Why do guys wear makeup?
 
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